Spoiler Alert: There Are No Awards for Bento Lunches
Look, I’m just gonna say it: I’m not that mom. I’m not the color-coded, chalkboard-labeling, bento-box-lunchmaking, themed-party-planning Pinterest mom. I realized I don’t have to be the Pinterest mom to be a good mom.
And I’ve tried. Lord knows I’ve tried.
I once attempted a DIY sensory bin I saw on Instagram. It looked magical—rainbow rice, wooden scoops, little alphabet beads. Then by the time I was done vacuuming rice out of the heating vent, I realized something: Pinterest moms are great. But I’m just not one.
And you know what? That doesn’t make me a bad mom. It doesn’t make you a bad mom either.
I’m a “Do What Works” Mom
Some days, lunch is frozen nuggets, grapes, and those expired baby puffs I found under the couch.
Other days, we eat hummus with our fingers because the baby is screaming and no one has any clean spoons.
But here’s the thing—my kids are loved, fed, safe, and cuddled. Whether their snack comes in a heart-shaped muffin tin or a Ziploc bag.
That’s the part no one puts on Pinterest boards: the real stuff. The loving stuff. The I-showed-up-even-when-I-was-running-on-empty stuff.
The Problem With the Pinterest Ideal
The Pinterest mom fantasy makes it look like “good motherhood” means:
- Matching outfits with your children
- Curated sensory bins with natural materials
- Coordinated birthday parties with chalkboard welcome signs
- Handcrafted learning stations in your living room
But here’s what my kids actually remember:
- That I danced to Bluey with them in the kitchen
- That I stayed up all night when they were sick
- That I let them crack the eggs, even if half the shell got in the pan
They remember my presence, not my Pinterest boards.
Neurodivergent Brain + Parenting = A Whole Different Game
As a mom with ADHD, I struggle with executive function, time blindness, and sensory overload. So no, I’m not cutting sandwiches into dinosaur shapes on a school morning.
I can barely find the matching socks, and if I do, they’re probably still damp from the dryer I forgot to run.
If you’re like me, here’s your permission slip:
💌 You don’t have to be the Pinterest mom.
💌 You just have to be the you that your kids already love.
What “Good Mom” Means in My House
In our home, “good mom” means:
- Responding with empathy (after maybe taking a breath in the bathroom)
- Modeling repair after meltdowns—both mine and theirs
- Showing them it’s okay to be imperfect and still be worthy of love
- Letting them help cook even if it turns into a flour tornado
Yes, I buy store-bought cupcakes for school events. Yes, my 3-year-old has watched the same episode of Blippi 400 times. No, I don’t feel bad about it anymore.
🛒 Product I Love: The Real Mom Journal — A no-pressure space to jot down what went right today. Because often, we forget.
Letting Go of Comparison = Mental Freedom
I used to scroll Instagram and spiral:
“She’s doing handmade Montessori trays for her 2-year-old while I’m counting Fruit Loops as a math activity.”
But I’ve stopped doom-scrolling and started reality-scrolling:
- My 5-year-old told me, “Mommy, you’re funny and you smell like waffles.”
- My 3-year-old with ADHD fell asleep snuggling me after a meltdown.
- My 4-month-old smiled mid-diaper change like I was the best person in the world.
Those are wins. Big ones.
I don’t have to be the Pinterest mom to prove I’m a good mom. My kids are my proof.
How I Keep It Simple and Real
✨ Our crafts: Paper, glue, and whatever we have lying around. One time we made “puppets” out of socks and cereal boxes.
✨ Our sensory play: Dried beans in a shoebox. Bonus points if no one eats them.
✨ Our learning time: Cooking together. I call it a math and science lesson when we follow a recipe. (Because it is.)
✨ Our structure: Loosely timed “anchor points” like snack, outside play, nap (ha!), and dinner. Predictability, not perfection.
(If you’re curious how we build flexible routines that work with neurodivergence, check out this blog post about a real life routine for ADHD families.)
Truth Time: I Still Feel Insecure Sometimes
Even now, I have moments. When I walk into someone’s perfectly curated playroom or see another mom’s color-coded snack prep on social media, that old voice creeps in:
“You’re not doing enough.”
So I talk back:
- “Enough is showing up with love.”
- “Enough is keeping them fed and hugged and heard.”
- “Enough is surviving today and trying again tomorrow.”
Also? I unfollowed most “perfect mom” accounts. Protect your peace, friend.
Reframing the Narrative
We don’t need more Pinterest-perfect parenting. We need more honest, real, neurodivergent-affirming parenting stories.
Stories where:
- Your 3-year-old runs around naked mid-Zoom call
- Dinner is cereal
- You forget to switch the laundry again
And still—you’re doing a beautiful, radical thing: loving your kids with your whole messy heart.
What Really Matters to Kids (Hint: Not Aesthetics)
Your kids won’t remember the handcrafted Easter baskets. They’ll remember:
- How you kissed their forehead when they were scared
- The silly faces you made during diaper changes
- How you said “I’m sorry” when you got it wrong
They remember how you made them feel, not how your Instagram feed looked.
Tools That Help Me Ditch the Pressure
🛒 The Real Mom Journal — Helps me track emotional wins, not Pinterest ones
🛒 Gratitude Cards for Moms — Quick reflection prompts I actually remember to use
🛒 Low-Prep Activity Cards for Toddlers — Keeps my 3-year-old occupied without glitter explosions
Final Thought: The Best Mom for Your Kids? You.
It’s not a stranger on Pinterest. Not a mom from a parenting forum. Not even the “you” from five years ago. The YOU right now—tired, imperfect, learning—is exactly who your kids need.
You’re the mom who shows up. Who says “I love you” even after a hard day. Who might forget library books but never forgets to hug tight.
And that, my friend, is everything. You don’t have to be the Pinterest mom.
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